This week I started watching and then turned off too many films, including The Longest Ride, Sex Ed and almost ten more.

Delivery Man

Vince is believable as a Polish person. This is the second time I see him play a Polish person. Remember when he was a tourist guide on turist bus in The Breakup with Jennifer Aniston? I expected the film to be even more cheesy, so I am satisfied with it.

I had it. I had pitched the perfect game, and I had to screw the whole thing up. My mother saw the whole thing on TV.
She must have been surprised to find out that you had a male lover.
No. She said she always suspected it. She told me we would make a lovely couple.
And your kids?
They think it’s cool.

6/10

Bad Words

What a surprise. I expected it to be filthy and full of bad words film portraying exactly what the poster promised. Instead we got a good enough family film, with funny moments. It surely wasn’t insightful but it was light and that’s all I needed after this especially exhausting week. Even the highly racist nicknames were on point.

Why don’t you take your potty mouth, go locate your pre-teen cock-sucking son and stuff him back up that old blown-out sweat sock of a vagina and scoot off back to whatever shit-kicking town you came from!

5/10

Lemon Tree Passage

You do not really have to be interested in unexplained paranormal things to bump into this urban legend. And I really wish they stuck with it. There might have been a gang rape in Lemon Tree Passage, that was not publicised but they should have went with the legend, like they started. It was promising, up until the point when it shifted from its original course. Despite all that I liked that the film turned all rape and revenge, but what I don’t understand is why did the ghost kill the girl? I get why she would kill men that stopped on the passage, but the girl? Which ever motorcycle incident they would have chosen, we would have went along with it.

5/10

The Alphabet Killer

What a drag. I knew there was a reason I never wanted to watch Wrong Turn saga, this was awful. At it all would have been avoided if they did not make the main character schizophrenic. Horrors are always better when it’s all real. Or at least we might have found it out at the end. It started off so good and so quickly went with flames. The story made me want to watch the other movie based on this story. Isn’t it weird that the killings/rapes stopped? Did the killer change his tactics?

Mostly the job is to ask questions. The frustrating part, the part that drives you crazy, is that the people you really want to talk to are dead.

Why didn’t you tell me you knew the victims?
Because then you would have known that I killed them.

In 2006, police exhumed a fireman’s body and posthumously cleared him as a suspect. To date, the Alphabet Killer has not been found.

4/10

 

Advertisements