I am so ready for the fall season to start. I hope I will be able to mourn Dexter but still get excited about other shows. I have made my peace with The Big C ending and Cathy dying. I still haven’t seen the finale of Private Practice, I’m still too fragile to say goodbye. I am waiting for some special occasion, but yesterday was my 20th birthday and the finale was right there on my dvr and I chose to watch earlier episodes of the season instead. I’m starting to think I’ll never be ready. I just think It needs to be a special day, and I simply haven’t had one since January. I miss Addie and Violet and seeing Kate and Amy on my screen. I hate that so many of my shows are ending, like I haven’t had enough changes. I have said goodbye to The Big C, I still haven’t recovered from The Killing cancelletion. I truly don’t feel like starting a new show. There are too many changes and disappointments in my life right now. Private Practice, The Big C ended. Dexter ends in 2 days. Go On, not the best, but my favorite new show of the fall 2012 got cancelled. The Killing, a great show that I have started watching less than 2 months ago got cancelled. Camp, a cute and fun summer show won’t probably make it and a half of the shows I watch don’t come back till January. I was desperate to find a new show to fill this empty space and started watching shows I promised I never would and there are only two shows still on air that I love unconditionally and never fail to surprise me. And I hate that. I hate changes, feeling like I’ve failed at life and have no purpose and most of all, I hate being an adult.

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