Scre4m

That was the movie I was waiting the longest for! Aaand I wasn’t disappointed! Probably second best after the first, I was shocked who turned out to be a killer, and I seriously think that if Panettiere got the role of Jill, movie would be just perfect, Culkin and Roberts broke this movie, I didn’t like them at all. I was so afraid that Gale was going to die! It was a very good one. Courteney Cox character is definitely the best. Kirby was amazing. And where the hell  is Patrick Dempsey? He survived the last one he should be in this one too, right? And again our super trio survived the massacre.

Welcome home, Sidney. You’re a survivor, aren’t you, Sidney? What good is it to be a survivor when everyone close to you is dead? You can’t save them. All you can do… is watch.

Go ahead if you have the guts!

Time for your last question: name the remake of the groundbreaking…

Halloween, Texas Chainsaw, Dawn of the Dead, The Hills Have Eyes, Amityville Horror, Last House on the Left, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare On Elm Street, My Bloody Valentine, When A Stranger Calls, Prom Night, Black Christmas, House of Wax, The Fog, Piranha. It’s one of those, right? Right?

This isn’t a comedy, it’s a horror film. People live, people die and you’d better start running.

Wait, wait you’re not supposed to kill me! I’m… I’m gay! …. If… if that helps?

You forgot one rule about remakes – never fuck with the original.

-Did that surprise you?
-Why?
-Because you talk too much!
-Now shut the fuck up and watch the movie.

Four years of class together and you notice me now? You stupid bitch! It’s too late! Shhh, I know. It doesn’t happen as fast as it does in the movies, I know.

Your lemon squares taste like ass.

It was the killers voice, from Stab. Or, I mean, you know, from your life.

My friends? What world are you living in? I don’t need friends, I need fans. Don’t you get it? This has never been about killing you. It’s about, becoming you. I mean for fuck sake my own mother had to die, no great loss there, so I could stay true to the original. It’s sick, right? Well sick, is the new sane. You had your fifteen minutes, now I want mine! I mean what am I supposed to do? Go to college? Grad school? Work? Look around, we all live in public now, we’re all on the internet. How do you think people get famous anymore? You don’t have to achieve anything! You just got to have fukced up shit happen to you. So, you do have to die Sid. Those are the rules. New movie, new franchise. There’s only room for one lead and let’s face it. Your ingenue days, they’re over, don’t tell me you didn’t know this day would come.”

I’m gonna slit your eyelids in half so that you can’t blink when I stab you in the face.

9/10.

Just Go with It

Nicole Kidman was hilarious! Coconut competition was amusing. Hawaii… This young blonde one was annoying, I was like, when will she go? Kids were great. I really had a good time, this kid Mickey pooping on this ugly german’s hand. Favourite scene when he wanted to go back see Katherine, and she did the same thing. And Jen Aniston’s body!

-I am a divorcee with 2 kids, and I have them name poop after you.

-Ian and I are breaking up.
-What? Why?
-Well for starters, he’s gay.
-You know, I gotta say, last night, with the coconut in the ass, kind of a red flag.

– I can’t wait to Twitter this to all my friends.
– Oh I forgot, you’re 15.

8/10

The Switch

After seeing this movie my mom was so mad at me, cause we didn’t see it at cinema, cause what I said I believe was ‘I’m not watching this shit’ and I was wrong, this was probably Jen Aniston at her best! Though my fav movie with her is always gonna be Rumor Has It, but this one was great too. When this kid got kicked and came to his daddy’s place, or how he hated this blonde one, and how she said: I turned him down, because he wasn’t you. I was like yeeah! And best scene was this main character’s best friend eaten a chocolate bar while on a running and said I’m a two at burning fat programme, and your burning muscules. And Julliette Lewis! ‘Who bit the kid?’

Look at us, running around. Always rushed, always late. I guess that’s why they call it the human race. What we crave most in this world is connection. For some people it happens at first site. It’s when you know you know. It’s fate working its magic. And that’s great for them. They get to live in a pop song. Ride the express train. But that’s not the way it really works. For the rest of us, it’s a bit less romantic. It’s complicated, it’s messy. It’s about horrible timing, and fumbled opportunities. And not being able to say what you need to say when you need to say it. At least, that’s the way it was for me.

9/10

Little Nicky

My favorite comedy ever! So many amazing quotes! I love all the movies that show us what hell does look like, but this is hilarious! Reese Witherspoon’s character 😀 Wes Craven’s movie with Ozzy in it and Tarantino! If that is what hell looks like I wanna go there! These two satanists are my favorite characters!

– Remember, you have to shove a pineapple up Hitler’s ass at 4 p.m.

– I’m from the South. The Deep South.

– You can do it, Ozzy! Bite ‘is freakin’ head off!

– Did you check out the dragon mouth?
– The Dark Prince is here!

– We are forever your slaves!

– I deserve this! I deserve this!

Kid: I came for the beer and the bitches.

– The last time you said everything was alright, the Renaissance happened.

9/10

Red Eye

I wanted to see this thriller of Wes Craven. And… the killer’s eyes were so bright, it was hard to look at him. I was hoping he’ll kill all these people on a plane, but unfortunately this didn’t happen. Rachel McAdams not bad, I wouldn’t write with soap on that mirror, I would probably write with a pen (if i had one) on a toilet paper, it was rather obvious that he’s going to come in and check her, I was so sure he wasn’t gonna miss this elevator, this old lady was annoying, Brian Cox rocked this movie, I was afraid he’ll die, and i was sad when he’s wallet was stolen and my hero is that redhead receptionist! And that stupid pair whining all the time, I mean come on, your hotel just exploded and you whine about some stupid room. I didn’t like it that much, but then my father said what the hell am i talking about, it was a good thriller, so maybe he’s right.

– You want us to fill out a comment card?
– Yes, I do… and after you finish, you can go ahead and just shove it up your ass.

7/10

Ghost World

I have already seen it once, but i didn’t remember much, and I always thought that Thora Birch was one of the best young actresses, so I watched it again. I couldn’t believe she got kicked out form scholarship. But the way she fucked up her life, that’s just how it is. Very good movie. And TJ Thyne is in it! I loved the satanist couple with their black umbrellas, and this guy with nunchaku!

-Do you serve beer or any alcohol?
-I wish. Actually you wish, after about five minutes of this movie, you’re gonna wish you had ten beers.

– So, what do you do if you’re a Satanist anyway?
-Sacrifice virgins and stuff.

8/10.

Cursed

I had no idea Christina Ricci starred in in. When this wolf attkted I was like what the hell, Cujo? Her brother is so annoying through all the movie, and Ricci is in half of the movies I like and I am still not her fan. Her dream was okay, guy waking up naked, oh god… when she started to smell blood, immediately I was like, Penelope? That was lame, then she started listening to Three Days Grace’ Are you ready, and I was like, thank you. When this guy came and said he’s gay, I almost pissed myself. I wouldn’t guess her boyfriend was a wolf too, It was pretty obvious that wolfman is going to attack this bitch in pantera costume, right? When he yelled to the moon with that face, I was like, come on. Then I was like oh, look, what a cute teddy bear. I don’t see how could they think they are not wolves anyomore? Hate happy endings. The only plus  was Judy Greer, who gave her best! I just don’t like werewolfs horrors and that was definitely Wes Craven’s worst movie.

I guess there’s no such thing as safe sex with a werewolf.

Fair fight? This is Hollywood!

-What the fuck was that?
-My dog.
-What kinda dog do you have?

– I’m not going to kill her. I’m just gonna rip her to shreds and let her choke on her own blood… and then maybe I’ll eat her.

2/10

The Dark

I actually liked it a lot, I have no idea why it reminded me of Orphanage so much, but it just did. This Ebril was so evil, father looked like he didn’t give  adamn about his daughter, and then naive thought it was her. I just loved the ending, the story of the family, and how the hell could he tell her that he’s gonna be her father, he forgot about his daughter already? Gorgeous views nice storyline.

7/10

The Husk

Was thinking about Children of corn all the time watching it, and that was a masterpiece, this one was just very crappy. All I have to say is nice location/corn.

2/10

My Soul To Take

Better than Cursed but definitely second worst movie of Wes Craven. Not bad, but nothing special. Main character, terrible acting.

3/10

Lymelife

Emma Roberts and Rory Culkin in the 3rd movie together. Hated the main character, his brother was great though. I have to say people claim it was a very good movie, but I saw million stories like that. Alec Baldwin and Cythia Nixon ruled this movie. Points up for the perfect ending.

7/10.

Broken

Remind me again why was I watching this shit? That was just terrible, one of the worst movies I so.

2/10.

Butcher House

That dark girl, not sure what was she supposed to represent goth/metal brought shame to all the people of these ethnic groups, she was just a coward.

7/10.

Imagine Me And You

One of the cutest romantic comedies ever. Definitely one of my favorites.

9/10.

The Haunting

Not that bad. Loved the place, this building was an abolute masterpiece, new all the actors but didn’t like anyone, ok, maybe Catherina Zeta Jones’ character was a good friend. Nice climate. Beautiful beaulding. Love special effects.

6/10.

Hatchet

Very disappointed. I just don’t like movies were the killer is some disabled kid. All characters annoying. Decided to give it a shot when I read Robert Englund was starring, and he usually guarantees a good movie, but from all movie it was his character that I loved, and unfortunately he got killed after two minutes on screen. I feel bad this black guy died, he was my favorite!

Move your asses, you don’t want to get killed do you?

3/10.

Blair Witch Project

Had time, watched it again. Don’t know why people love it so much, but I love it too.

8/10.

Lost Things

Not bad, could have been worse.

7/10.

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